gutspill
what is wrong with me
i know that somethings wrong
very wrong
its beyond my control
i cant handle it
everything is out of my control
please let me speak
please let it just happen
please believe me when i tell you i cant do this
i cant think and i cant be
its so hard
its all creeping up on me like some inevitable doom i cant stop
its too much
its all too much
please i cant do it
at least let me speak
do anything to alleviate my pain
kill me if you have to
i dont care
tell me im irrational and tell me to grow up. tell me im just stubborn and useless. confirm the things that i believe and make it hurt.
but im trying
i am
and if thats not enough then just kill me
i hate my mind and its twisted realities it creates
its my own fault it wont stop, isnt it
its only going to get worse
i cant stop it
i wish nobody cared
i wish i wasnt loved
i hate it
i hate it so much
what is wrong with me
why was i made to hurt
why is life so cruel
im trying
i really am