ramblings from an internet wolf

forgotten

i dont get it. why is it always me? why i am the one who is left behind? why am i the hypocrite? why can’t i let myself in?

i guess this is how its always been. just leave me and forget me, its okay. i wont care. ill just blankly stare, smile, and keep my mouth shut. you wont know how i feel.

it doesn’t matter.

its petty and stupid anyways.

i just want to be loved. i want to know im worth something. i want to be more than your past. you should know im watching, im wanting. i want you to know your love is built upon my longing. i want you to know how desperately im holding on. how my hands are skinned and morphing into bleeding slashes of flesh as i try to pull you in. please stop leaving me here. please stop loving them. i’m still here.

i know where my own faults are. so please mend yours. please just realize what you’ve done to me.

but i wouldnt say it to your face, i wont. i told myself i wouldn’t ever bleed for you ever again, and i wont.

you wouldnt understand anyways. you’re happy.